Author Archive

‘Dear John’ Beats Out ‘Avatar’

In Celebrity News, Movies on February 7, 2010 at 7:20 pm

Shocked?? I’m not. It’s about time that blue alien flick got knocked off its pedestal. And it makes it even funnier that it was a sappy chick flick that did it in.

Dear John has become the highest grossing flick over a Super Bowl weekend ever, bringing in more than $32.4 million. The film, starring that one dude from She’s the Man and that one chick from Jennifer’s Body, has beat many experts estimates over the weekend.

The flick had a huge Friday, making more than $13 million, while Avatar only made $6 million (impressively, only a -16% drop). The storms sweeping across the nation may have had an impact on the total grosses for both films, but given the huge lead Dear John creted on Friday, Avatar didn’t have a chance of catching up.

Nice to see sappy, romance novels can still be turned into high grossing films.

That gives you hope, Julia Roberts. That gives you hope.

‘Cause we all know your career needs a resurgance. What’s the last hit flick you had?? Exactly.

dOOr cLoSeD.


(P.S. See full weekend Box Office Gross after the jump) Read the rest of this entry »


Brand New Close the Door, Please is open for business! Woot-Woot!

In dior, Personally on January 5, 2010 at 3:47 pm

Hey, Close the Door, Please WordPress is moving! Check out our new site at www.closethedoorplease.com .

You will still get the latest breaking news from the entertainment world and same witty commentary from me, but now at a different location. Get rid of closethedoorplease.wordpress.com! That’s too long!

Just type: www.closethedoorplease.com!! Woot-Woot!

No new posts will be made on this site. You need to visit closethedoorplease.com to get the newest updates. The site has a brand new look, new features, and guest posts from some of the funniest, wittiest people I know! Check out and tell me what you think.

Only at Close the Door, Please!

dOOr cLoSeD.


Sneak PEEK!

In Uncategorized on January 5, 2010 at 3:01 am

Wanna check out the new Close the Door, Please?? You know you want to!


OH and by the way, no longer do you have to use closethedoorplease.wordpress.com! That’s friggin’ long!

Just use, closethedoorplease.com ! See much simpler!



Everything is Moving!!!

In dior on January 5, 2010 at 12:44 am

But not too far though!

Close the Door, Please is getting a makeover! Check back soon for more deets on the new website, feature brand new features and guest posts from some of the funniest people you meet! Oh and there’s another secret, too.

But I can’t tell you that just yet. Hee-Hee! (Did I just type that??)

dOOr cLoSeD.


Jon Gosselin Has A New Woman! Already?!? What Happened To You Slowing Down?

In Reality Whores on January 4, 2010 at 7:01 pm

What could these women possibly attractive in this man? I don’t understand. He has no money. Has 8 kids. And is ugly as the pitbull you just saw. What gives?

Image via/Jrcla2

Jon Gosselin, you know that one dude who used to have a reality show about raising his 8 kids with his now ex-wife, has a new girlfriend and her name is Morgan….Captain Morgan.

Okay, so she’s not named after a bottle of alcohol, but she must be tipping that bottle if she is ACTUALLY okay with rolling over and finding Jon Gosselin next to her in bed.

According to some nosey ass people, Jon Gosselin met this 23 year-old Morgan last December at a party in Park City Utah. The two have been inseperable since, as the mystery woman followed Jon to New York City to ring in the new year together.

And it seems like Gosselin has turned over a new leaf and actually has become, wait for it, *GASP* a good boyfriend!

Sources say:

“He watches out for her. When she drank too much at the club, he made sure she drank water. He held her arm leaving the club so she wouldn’t stumble. He made sure no guys took advantage of her.”

Isn’t that his friggin’ job in the very beginning?? Come on now, you’re 33 years old and you’re just NOW figuring this out?! Oh and take this as you will, but these same sources are claiming that this Morgan comes from a very wealthy family.

Hmmm….OctoDad? Check. Male GoldDigger? Check.

Seems like Jon is working on his resume.

dOOr cLoSeD.


SHOCKER! Tiger Gives Wife, Elin, A $300M For Alleged “Transgressions”??

In Celebrity News on January 4, 2010 at 12:46 pm

That’s what some reports are saying.

Shit, is that my money flying away?

Damn! What is this, $25M per whore? Wow! According to some reports surfacing today, Tiger Woods, you know that one dude who USED to be a respected golfer and family man, gave his wife $300M to forgive him for his “transgressions.”

Okay, I’m going to take this news with a grain of salt, so I don’t know if this is exactly true. But look, I don’t think they will be staying with one another any time soon. I am interested in knowing how much exactly she will get. Tiger Woods is worth $1 Billion, mind you. How tight is that pre-nup?

Is the pre-nup worthless now that infidelity is involved? My advice to Elin:

TAKE HALF! RUN WITH IT! FAST!  Haha, no I’m just kidding…

Take it all.

dOOr cLoSeD.


Does Anyone Still Watch the Apprentice?

In Uncategorized on January 4, 2010 at 11:02 am

Please, if you do, come forward and claim no reward.

Umm, who are these people?

I don’t really care to write an entire article about this, so I’m just going to give you the “interesting” parts of this.

dOOr cLoSeD.


Tiger on the Cover of Vanity Fair! And Shirtless!

In Celebrity News on January 4, 2010 at 10:57 am

This is what you’ve been fighing for ladies? Look at his hairy nipples and botched stomach? Whoa, looks like you girls were blinded that wad of cash he must have in his pockets.

Say Cheese! (Image via/Vanity Fair)

In a smart move by Vanity Fair, Tiger Woods, unknowingly probably, graced the cover of their newest issue due to hit stands this February.

“The Mystery of a Sports Superstar” is the name of the accompanying article which will feature never-before-seen pictures of the golfer. But let’s get back to the cover photo.

Tiger! Why the hell are your hair nipples curling? You look like you’re in jail. Your face? Ghostly. Your body? Creepy as fuck.

Seriously, I don’t know if you’re about to swing a golf club or murder me.

dOOr cLoSeD.


Listen Up! Unreleased Michael Jackson Song Hits the InterWebs!

In Celebrity News, Music on January 4, 2010 at 12:08 am

And it sounds a hell out of a lot better than Michael Jackson’s, “This Is It.”

The song is a duet with singer Lenny Kravitz entitled, “Another Day.” This is probably one of many songs that Jackson has recorded over his lifetime that have not seen the light of day…that is until now.

Hell, if 2Pac and Biggie can make 8 albums each after they have both died, why can’t the King of Pop. So here’s what I predict will happen: the estate of Michael Jackson will find all these songs that have not yet been released and make a compilation CD and earn millions of dollars from the sales.

Watch it happen. It’s not a bad idea, either. I definitely would buy the album…only if the shit on it doesn’t sound like “This Is It.”

I’m sorry, ya’ll but that was some wack ass confusion of a song. “Another Day” sounds much better.

Take a listen for yourself above!

dOOr cLoSeD.


“True Blood” Casting News! Lafayette Gets A Man!

In Television on January 3, 2010 at 11:59 pm

For those True Blood fans out there good news, Lafayette is getting a boyfriend…and he’s no vampire (yet).

Image via/HBO

The colorful Lafayette, played excellently by Nelsan Ellis, has been missing out on all the play-play going on in Bon Temps, the town in which vampires, shifshapers, and crazy ass bitches run free.

(Although, I did hear a rumor, SPOILER, that Lafayette and Eric were supposed to get a little…close with one another. Hmm, we’ll see if that pans out.)

Reports show that latino actor, Kevin Alejandro, some dude who starred in Southland and other cancelled shows, has been cast as Lafayette boyfriend, who also takes care of Lafayette’s mother, played by Alfre Woodard (woot-woot!).

Should be interesting? What do you think of this piece of casting news? Good choice?

Door open for discussion.